Nutrition is important to our mental health. When we are under stress, like when we are grieving, proper nutrition can improve our mood and our ability to cope. We need certain vitamins and nutrients to manage our stress levels and what the extra stress does to our bodies. Avoiding things like alcohol and sugar can help our body and mind recover from stress more easily.

But let’s be real. How likely are we to crave a salad on a good day- let alone a terrible one? Most of us know that healthy eating will make us feel better. The thing is, that’s not what our body craves. During tough times, we want all of the stuff our doctors tell us to avoid. For me, that’s usually carbs and almost always donuts. There is just something about a donut that turns my mood around and makes me happy. I’m well aware that it won’t make me feel better in the long run. I’ll probably have a bit of a sugar crash and go back to feeling whatever I was feeling. For that moment though, I get some comfort and a break from thinking about the bad stuff.

Life is about balance. Expecting ourselves to be perfect within our nutrition is unrealistic. It is especially unrealistic during a difficult time in your life. These are some tips that I recommend when people are struggling with their appetite.

Increased appetite- I recommend following the 80/20 rule. If 80% of what you eat provides nutritional value then allow yourself some fun foods. If most of your meals were healthy and provided some good vitamins and nutrients then give yourself a break and eat the donut/cookie/cake/french fries.

Decreased appetite- Try a meal replacement beverage to get something into your system that provides some level of nutrition. Look for a multivitamin that might supplement what you’re missing. And eat foods that you love. Most of us have foods that we love and can always manage to eat (there’s always room for dessert).

Try to avoid allowing diet/nutrition to be another stressor in your life. We’ve got enough to worry about without making ourselves feel bad about what we’re eating. Now I’m off to go get a sprinkled donut with a side of zero regrets.